A series of
short articles on the Bhagavad Gita for people living and working in our
volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous times filled with stress and fear.
This scripture born in a battlefield teaches us how to face our challenges,
live our life fully, achieve excellence in whatever we do and find happiness,
peace and contentment.
[Continued
from the previous post.]
Arjuna seeing all
the relatives gathered there was overcome by great compassion and said, “Seeing
my kinsmen standing here eager for battle, my limbs are failing me, Krishna. My mouth is dry, my body is shivering and my
hair is standing on end. The gandiva is slipping from my hand, my skin is
burning, my head is reeling and I am unable even to stand steady.” BG 1.27-30
Kamboji is a brilliant
Malayalam movie based on a widely published real incident that happened in
Kerala in my younger days. It is the story of a man named Kunjunnni besotted
with the highly sophisticated performing art kathakali which takes years of
training to master. Kathakali is what Kunjunni lives for, all his dreams are
about it. He has seen the great masters of the art performing and what he wants
to become is what they are.
At a rather
advanced age to learn kathakali, he comes to the guru he adores most and begins
studying under him in his small school in a remote village. He is soon
recognized as highly talented and almost fully accomplished in the art. A
loving father-son relationship soon develops between the guru and his disciple.
After some time the aged guru hands over the kathakali school to Kunjunni and
goes away. Kunjunni is given a place to stay in the large house of the family
that owns the school and soon their daughter Uma, herself an accomplished
dancer, and Kunjunni develop love for each other.
The ugly face
of jealousy now enters the picture and the village prostitute is bribed to
accuse Kunjunni of making her pregnant. Without allowing him to say a word in
his defense, he is asked to leave the school and go away immediately. It is the
girl of the house who asks him to leave, her parents being away, thus bringing
to an instant end his dream of becoming a great kathakali artiste and teacher as
well as living the rest of his life with the girl as his wife. He rushes to his
teacher – but the teacher too drives him away accusing him of shaming him. All
these things happen in the first half of a single night, driving Kunjunni insane
with pain and loss. In a state of fuming rage, Kunjunnni goes to the home of
the prostitute and stabs her to death.
What happened
to Kunjunni that night is what is called an emotional hijack. Under normal
circumstances Kaunjunni wouldn’t harm an insect, but under the impact of the
emotional hijack he brutally kills a woman.
Modern
psychology speaks of emotional hijacks as states in which we are completely
taken over by our emotions, our thinking and reason are suspended, our
intelligence itself is blocked by the amygdala glands in our brain and we
either go wild and do the craziest things or collapse helplessly under the burden
of our emotions, paralyzed, unable to stand on our legs, our body drained of
all energy, our mind losing all clarity.
It is Daniel
Goleman, famous for his masterly books on Emotional Intelligence and Social
Intelligence who coined the term amygdala hijack. As Goleman explains, even
though evolution has taken us a long way ahead, we still retain within our
brain the amygdala, an almond-shaped mass of nuclei, one in each of our brains,
the left and the right. The amygdala is essentially a survival tool and what it
does is to instantly respond to threats. Thinking takes time, assessing a
threatening situation takes time but the amygdala that functions based on
memories, instincts and impulses does not. The amygdala is fast, really fast,
whereas our intelligence is not.
For instance,
if we are driving on a fast road and all on a sudden another driver cuts in
from a side road, our response to it has to be instant. If it is left to the
intelligence to take a decision and then respond, it would try to assess the
distance between the two vehicles, their speeds and so on. But the amygdala
gives the order for instant action and your foot goes up from the accelerator
and comes down on the break without any loss of time.
However, this
system designed for instant action has its weaknesses too. Since actions are
taken before thorough assessments are made, they can often be wrong. Also, the
amygdala does not differentiate between real threats and imagined threats. The
amygdala reads a threat to the body or life and a threat to the ego – an
emotional threat – the same. And, unless we are in control, guided by the
amygdala we react the same way to a physical threat and an emotional threat. We
experience increased heart rate and blood pressure, our breathing becomes
quicker, faster and shallower, our body begins to shake, we sweat, our thinking
brain is shut off and we respond to the situation with an instant and intense
unconscious reaction produced by our emotional brain, sometimes frightening
ourselves as in the case of Kunjunni.
O0O
We saw how
what Arjuna sees and what Duryodhana sees are very different, though they are
looking at the same thing. To the power-intoxicated, war mongering Duryodhana
the people assembled in the battlefield are fierce warriors whereas to Arjuna
they are grandfathers, fathers, sons, uncles, nephews, brothers, gurus and so
on, all his own people. And his limbs suddenly fail him, his mouth dries up, his
body trembles, his hairs stand on end, his grip on his bow goes lose, his skin
burns all over and his mind reels. He is unable even to stand, let alone fight.
All these are typical signs of an emotional hijack.
The
Mahabharata speaks of several emotional hijacks. Later, during the war, when
Abhimanyu is killed, for instance, such is Arjuna’s pain in spite of all
Krishna’s teachings that undergoes another emotional hijack. On another
occasion during the war Yudhishthira, defeated and humiliated by Karna,
experiences an emotional hijack. He loses all control over himself and insults
Arjuna’s prowess in war and his celestial bow gandiva leading to Arjuna taking
a vow to kill him.
A young man
was once sent to me by his father who had attended one my emotional
intelligence workshops for corporate executives. The son used to work for a
multinational company and was under tremendous pressure to perform for a boss
obsessed with deadlines and constantly growing targets. Over time unable to
manage his work stress, the young man developed low blood sugar, a physical
condition ideal for emotional hijacks, and in that condition losing control
over his emotions he exploded at his boss, shouting at him, abusing him and
publicly humiliating him, which cost him his job. His father wanted me to help
him master his emotions so that such situations did not arise in the future.
O0O
One of the
greatest lessons the Bhagavad Gita teaches us is samatvam, remaining balanced under all circumstances. Again and
again, throughout his teachings, Krishna stresses the importance of samatvam and asks Arjuna to remain
balanced in victory and failure, praise and censure, gain and loss, while
dealing with enemies and friends. In spite of what the situation is and who you
are dealing with, remaining mentally balanced is absolutely essential. A warrior who is intimidated by the situation
and loses his mental balance has no chance of victory, whether he is in a real
battlefield or in a corporate one.
For success
in any endeavour, we need what Krishna calls vyavasayatmika buddhi, mind that is resolute and one pointed. And
that is possible only if our minds are steady and undisturbed by thoughts of
success and failure, or any distracting thoughts for that matter, while engaged
in doing something. That is why Krishna asks us to remain unaffected by
thoughts of victory and failure while engaged in action.
Krishna does
not mean pleasure and pain are the same, gain and loss are the same. What he
means is none of these should make us lose our balance of mind. We have to
remain unperturbed, collected and composed, fully in control, while we are
acting if we are to succeed.
Which does
not mean we should not celebrate when victory comes. The Mahabharata shows us
Krishna celebrating joyously victories, for instance after Karna used on
Ghatotkacha his all powerful, never failing shakti called Vaijayanti given to
him by Indra. The shakti could be used only once, Karna had been keeping it for
use against Arjuna, and Krishna was happy beyond words it had been used against
Ghatotkcha and Arjuna was safe from it, which called for celebration.
Krishna makes
the importance of remaining balanced and not getting carried by our emotions absolutely
clear repeatedly throughout the Gita. In spite of that, unless we have an open
mind it is easy to misunderstand him. I remember an occasion when I was
explaining to a large group of senior business school students the importance
of remaining sama in all
circumstances using a verse from the Gita when one of the students objected and
asked me rather aggressively how we could deal with enemies and friends the
same. She asserted she would never do that, she was going to deal with friends
the way friends should be dealt with, and with enemies the way enemies should
be dealt with.
Well, the
Gita does not ask us to deal with enemies and friends the same. For instance,
Krishna certainly does not want Arjuna to treat the warriors on his side and
the warriors on the enemy side the same. You should stand with the people on
your side and support them; and with those on the enemy side, you should fight.
What Krishna says is that you should do this with a balanced mind, with a calm
mind, centered and focused, without letting your emotions carry you away,
without giving your emotions a free reign to take your decisions for you.
An HR
manager, for instance, will have to take tough decisions against a corrupt
person, whatever his feelings for him. To fail to do so will be to fail as a
responsible manager. A person who is habitually unpunctual, who is lazy, who
consistently shirks his responsibilities, will have to be dealt with as he
deserves in spite of the fact that he may be your friend or nephew and you love
him. But you should do it with a calm mind, and not in anger or vengefulness.
That is what samata or samatvam means.
We are
familiar with the story of how Krishna killed his cousin Shishupala. Right from
the beginning Shishupala was abusive of Krishna and Krishna quietly endured it
all, never reacting. He had promised Shishupala’s mother, who was Krishna’s
aunt, that he would not do anything against her son until he crossed a hundred
occasions of insulting him. There were
numerous occasions that called for punitive action by Krishna but it was only
when he went beyond all limits during Yudhishthira’s rajasuya sacrifice that
Krishna acted against him, reminding him that he has crossed the limit of one
hundred instnces. Before doing so, Krishna had warned him again and again. That
is samatvam.
O0O
In the
battlefield of life, we all need control over our mind, control over our
emotions, and should be able to resist the tendency of emotions to hijack us. Emotions
are like the horses that pull the chariot of our life, and we should keep our
mastery over them unless we are to end up in the nearest gutter or in a hospital.
Meditation is
a powerful way of developing control over the mind and not letting our emotions
hijack us. Practicing mindfulness while engaged in all kinds of activities like
having a cup of coffee, taking a walk, trying to solve a tough problem, having
a conversation with someone, or, to use some traditional examples, mowing the
garden, splitting wood, or pulling up water from a well, helps us develop
mastery over the mind. The Shiva Sutras, a book of Kashmir Shaivism frequently
considered to be among the most advanced books on meditation and spirituality,
asks as to be constantly mindful.
Regular
practice of deep breathing can be very helpful. The first thing an emotional
hijack affects is our breathing – it becomes rapid and shallow. So if we can keep
breathing deeply – breathe abdominally, allowing our abdomen to expand and
shrink as we breathe in and out, and not from the chest by holding our stomach
tight – it will be of immense help. No emotional hijack is possible so long as our
breathing is abdominal.
Arjuna’s
grandson Parikshit is an unforgettable reminder to us for what happens when we
are emotionally hijacked. He was on a hunting trip chasing a deer, was tired,
hungry and drained of all energy. The deer had disappeared and seeing a rishi
sitting in meditation nearby, he asks him if he had seen it. Unknown to
Parikshit, the rishi, Shamika by name, was observing mauna, a vow of silence, and
does not respond to the king’s repeated questions. Losing control over himself,
Parikshit does the unthinkable: he picks up a dead snake he finds nearby and
drapes it around the rishi’s neck, something no sane man would do, something unimaginable
in a Bharata king, unless he had lost all control over his emotions, unless, to
use the modern expression, he had been emotionally hijacked. When the rishi’s
son Shringi later learns about the incident nd curses Parikshit to die within
seven days. And that is how Parikshit loses his life.
One of the
most brilliant examples for a woman who amazes us with her self-mastery is
Draupadi in the dice hall of Hastinapura during what is perhaps the most
shameful incident in all of Indian history. Wagered and lost by her husband in
the game he was playing with Duryodhana, this magnificent woman is brought dragged
into the dice hall by her hair from the women’s quarters of the palace by
Dusshasana. There Karna calls her a prostitute for living with five men. Duryodhana
calls her a slave and revealing his naked left thigh asks her to come and sit
on it as though she was a common whore, while her husbands remain helpless
spectators to the whole monstrous incident. On the orders of Karna, Dusshasana
tries to disrobe her in that assembly of men that included her husbands, their
cousins, her father-in-law, men like grandsire Bhishma and guru Drona and
scores of other kings come to watch the dice game. And all this happens when
she was in her monthly period and as custom required in those days was wearing
a single piece of cloth. In spite of all this, she retains mastery over her
emotions and has the presence of mind to ask if she had really become a slave to
Duryodhana since her husband had already lost himself when he wagered her.
Not once does
she allow her emotions to hijack her throughout the whole incident. When her
appeals to the elders in the assembly fail, she prays to Krishna for help and
is miraculously saved. Following the miracle and the terrible omens that began
appearing everywhere, a terrified Dhritarashtra begs her for forgiveness. He
then asks her to ask for boons and she asks for just two boons, first that
Yudhishthira be freed from slavery and then that her other husbands who had
also become slaves in the dice game be released from slavery and given their
weapons and chariots. Asked to ask for still more boons, this woman, dignity
personified, says no, saying a kshatrani is entitled to ask for only two boons
and she has already asked for them. And
then she adds calmly that if her husbands are freed and have their weapons with
them, then she does not need anything else, giving us goosebumps as we read of
it after five thousand years, making us to want to stand up and clap for her
from across five millennia.
Krishna teaches
Arjuna throughout the Bhagavad Gita the importance of such self-mastery. He
teaches him through the words of his divine song how to develop such
self-mastery even in the middle of the most challenging situations. Through
Arjuna, he teaches us how to fight the battles of our life without surrendering
to feverishness, in full mastery of ourselves, without allowing emotional
hijacks to overpower us – so that victory and glory are ours.
O0O
Photo
courtesy: Devender Malhotra
Thank you in advance for your questions and
comments.
